Official Description:
My name is Isabella. Just Isabella. Everything has been taken from me. I’m one of the unseen. I am one of the unheard. M/Dark-Graphic-Violent/Please see warning before reading.
Word Count: 12,237
I have started writing this review and deleted everything that I’ve typed at least fourteen times. If you’re a woman, you should read this. If you’re a man who has a sister or a mother or a daughter, you should read this. That isn’t because I don’t think that men are put into this situation every day too, it’s just–yeah. I don’t have the words.
So, I’ll start with Kate’s. The warning at the beginning:
[dcs_p]In my mind, Twific is here for our entertainment, not to make moral statements or judgments. Ultimately, however, I decided to go ahead and put this out there because I think there’s some value in looking at subject matter realistically, even if it’s in the context of fan fiction.[/dcs_p]
[dcs_p]This short story is not pleasant, nor is it beautiful, sweet, sexy, or romantic. It’s not meant to be at all. It’s very graphic, very violent, very disturbing, and very awful. The content is deliberately shocking. It is not meant to be titillating in any way whatsoever.[/dcs_p]
[dcs_p]There are no rainbows or HEAs here. There is a statement, however, and there are a few truths that I hope you will take away if you choose to read./[dcs_p]
This story is a story about a girl, named Bella. She was happy and loved and cherished and on her way to living her life. Until she made a stupid mistake that lots of teenagers (and adults, unfortunately) make and found herself in the middle of a hell that I don’t even want to think about.
At all.
But, just because I don’t want to think about it doesn’t mean that it’s not there, every day in every city all across my country–and yours, too. And the idea that I have thought of it and even glorified it makes me sick to think about. As a fanfiction reader, I have read some extreme situations that would make me physically ill if I heard about them in the news. Does it make a difference to me that Edward–beautiful, amazing, can do no wrong in my eyes Edward–is the one inflicting this pain on this girl? Would it matter to me if he drank orange juice before he violated her?
[dcs_p]His eyes soften for a moment and his grip loosens. Gently almost, he brushes my hair back away from my face. His mouth is at my ear, so close that the gritty stubble on his chin scrapes my skin, and he’s stroking my back underneath my t-shirt.[/dcs_p]
[dcs_p]“I hate it when you make me like this. I don’t like hitting you. You know that, right? No more fucking up, okay?” Edward murmurs.[/dcs_p]
[dcs_p]In my head, I’m calling him a liar, but I nod furiously, biting back more sobs.[/dcs_p]
[dcs_p]He’s pleased with my apparent sincerity, and he kisses my neck. His tongue is all over me, wet and slimy, and it takes everything I have to not pull away. Softer, in that voice that I despise, the one that he thinks is seductive and smooth, he tells me, “I’ll let you make it up to me, how’s that?”[/dcs_p]
[dcs_p]I close my eyes and I nod again, this time slowly and sadly, because it doesn’t matter what I say.[/dcs_p]
Fictionees, I’m not trying to get on a soap box here. And I know that Katinki’s purpose wasn’t to make me feel guilty or tell me what I should and shouldn’t read. That’s not what this story is about. In a world where I have desensitized myself to rape and violence and incest and sex between adults and minors (even if it’s consensual), I think I needed a wake-up call. Not to say I can’t read fics with those themes, but to be sure that I’m aware of the fine line between fiction and reality and to question whether I want to continue romanticizing such atrocities. No matter how I want to spin it, I just can’t do it.
And now, I’ve shifted focus from why you’re reading this recommendation right now. You want to know why I think you should read this one-shot. A Voice in the Darkness is just simply thought-provoking. It’s real. And I wish it wasn’t. It has everything that it should: a gripping storyline, realistic dialogue, and a Bella that I want to cheer for. I want her to be strong. I want her to…
It doesn’t matter what I want. What does matter is that Katinki has written one of the most well-written and amazing stories that I have ever read. I promise you that it will stay with you, long after you read it.
[dcs_p]
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I read this and it absolutely blew me away with its soul and the depths that Katinki took such a tragedy to allow the victim take back the one thing that was lost to her so long ago – Her Choice : )
Thank you for pointing out this story. I think it provides some much needed restoration of proper perspective for a lot of us. It was time for this — past time.
Amen. Some times I think people don’t realize they’re writing abuse because, as you said, Edward can do no wrong. Thanks for taking a step back and recognizing that that’s not okay. As a victim myself, I found it hard to read stories where the ultimate message after the violence was – it’s okay, she wanted it all along…it didn’t matter that he was violent because he was Edward. The truth is, she didn’t want it. So, thank you for showing that. I hope it gives the fandom a swift kick on its ass.
While I think that Katinki is awesome and brave for writing a story like this, I’m deeply concerned with the implication that the reading (any) fan fiction could be bad. What I mean to say is there is no correlation between the slave trade in the United States and erotic fan fiction. Poverty, ignorance and organize crime are the primary contributors to slavery (as it exists today).
I’m always disturbed and angered by the need of society and even women to make other women feel ashamed of what makes them happy or brings them pleasure. Even if the content of a fan fic is taboo, loathsome or completely inaccurate to real life, the reader should NEVER feel shame over enjoying it. Reading a fic will not destroy the world, kill a person or turn an otherwise sane person insane. And despite the teachings of Catholicism, a sin in the mind is just a harmless thought that lives IN YOUR MIND, nothing more.
While I think it’s very admirable that you felt so moved by this wonderful story, and that you’ve taken a moment to reexamine what fic you like and why you like, I hope that you do not feel shame for liking it.
At the end of the day, no woman should ever feel less for feeling good, especially when it comes to expressing or indulging her sexual desires.
*steps off of soapbox*
Maybe I should have been …idk, more clear? While I disagree to some degree with your statement that “no woman should ever feel less for feeling good, especially when it comes to expressing or indulging her sexual desires,” I was not aiming to make a statement that would imply that anyone should feel bad about or guilty for the fanfiction they choose to read.
I can’t say that I know the exact point that Katinki was trying to make by writing a story like this, but I can tell you what I took away from it. Can I justify every action that occurs in a story that I read by the character that commits the act? I feel like I’m trying to sound smarter than I am, and that’s not my intention. If the Edward in this story were replaced by any other character, I would never even consider excusing his actions. I knew because of the A/N at the beginning that there would be “no HEA,” but did that mean that I didn’t wish for it, because it was Edward? Could this fictional character redeem himself? And how can I consider the possibility that he could, just based on his name and hair color?
I stand by what I said in my review. It makes me sick–literally ill–to think that I have supported anything that condones rape. If I knew that my local grocery store owner was a rapist, I wouldn’t shop at his store. If I knew that the dude that sings my favorite song was a rapist, I wouldn’t listen to his music anymore. And yeah, if I know that the story that I was thinking about reading glorifies rape, I’m not reading it. Like I said, I needed the wake-up call “to be sure that I’m aware of the fine line between fiction and reality and to question whether I want to continue romanticizing such atrocities.” Rape is real, and I don’t care if you’re Edward Cullen. The girl you rape and sodomize and call a “cunt” is not going to love you. Period.
And, I guess you are right. Sin in the mind is just a harmless thought that lives in your mind. I think it’s a slippery slope, though. I feel like I’m being mean, and I hope that we are good enough friends that you know I’m not trying to be. I hope that everyone who visits this post realizes that I am not saying that they should feel the same way I do, about anything at all. If anyone wants to read a story, whether it’s fanfiction or otherwise, that the heroine falls in love with her captor and they live happily ever after, I think that’s fine. Also, I absolutely hate that this is dividing people. I hate that there is criticism involved at all. I wish there was something that I could say to let everyone know that I don’t think they’re horrible for reading it, because I don’t.
If nothing else, though, I want everyone to know that human trafficking is real. And that it’s happening in your back yard, right now. I want you to talk to your kids, if you have them. I want you to write a letter to your legislators and go speak at your local schools and just…don’t romanticize this horror that is awaiting thirty MILLION people every single day. And if making someone stop and think about their choice in what they are reading is what it takes to raise the awareness of slavery in America and abroad, then so be it.
Kassiah,
You know it takes a lot to offend me, and you haven’t done that at all. Your evaluations of your own opinions and feelings is personal, you have every right to do that. I just love you and don’t want to judge yourself too harshly.
I myself have written very disturbing fics that skirt the lines of morality and ethics. When I’ve done so it was for a specific purpose and I hope that I have always continued to portray my female characters as strong despite the circumstances of the story.
I do think it is good that you are looking at fics in a different light now. I know there are a lot of stories that do this and some in more subtle ways then others, but in the end it is up to each reader to decide for themselves if they want to read.
PS For more information about Human Trafficking and how you can help to bring it to an end, please go here http://www.humantrafficking.org/
A reader passed along this organization to me, too. Very informative:
http://www.livingwaterforgirls.org/
In general I love anything that Katinki writes. I couldn’t read this, not because it wasn’t beautifully written or because it was an important perspective, but because I totally suck at angst/tragedy. I applaud her strongly, however, for write this and reminding us that while some readers, myself included may enjoy the occasional controlling hero, there is a real group of people out there who suffer from this and it is not fun or hot. So thanks and kudos to K and to Fictionators for bringing it to our attention.
I got it on my alerts yesterday and went right away to read it. Really hard to do but neccessary to put out there, to makes us not lose perspective. It´s sad to witness a lovable character turned into something hideous and pretend that people love it.
It is disturbing to read the reviews to slavery fics, it makes me doubt of the candid nature of humans, but luckily and bravely we have writers like Katinki, who put themselves on the hot spot to make us think and understand.
I found this story profoundly disturbing because it is based on truth and the fact that anyone has had to live in this situation is horrifying. The story is very well written though………Katinki did an excellent job.
I have been reading fanfic off and on for oh, about a year. I’m a horrible commenter. To any authors who may happen to read this, I’ve probably read your story, loved it, and never said a thing. (To Kassiah – love this site – your recs almost never disappoint.)
I kinda had to skim this story, as I can’t imagine anything more horrible than sexual slavery. Rape is horrifying enough. To be subjected to it day in and day out is unthinkable, yet everything she wrote as fiction has and is happening to someone as I write this. The world we live in at times makes no sense. Thank you Katinki, for writing a moving piece that could not have been easy to put out there or put yourself in the mindset to write.
However, I am a little wary at making an example of how certain “people” write Edward. There seems to be some finger wagging at certain stories in the reviews, and I would urge people to not demonize anyone in the process of re-evaluating your opinion. I don’t just want to regurgitate what Einfach Mich has said above, but it was well put. Yes, I’ve started and stopped reading stories because I didn’t like the dynamic between Bella and Edward, or found it too disturbing, but I don’t think that automatically makes it wrong, and I’m sure I’ve enjoyed things that have been too much for someone else. At the end of the day the fic isn’t real, and I’d be hard pressed to believe any woman intends a disservice to the actual victims. Stephen King is a brilliant horror author; doesn’t mean he condones murder.
Also, P.S. to Einfach Mich, the PPSS also rocks my socks. (Sorry, had to lighten this up a little!)
Great point about Stephen King. Thanks, glad to know that you love PPSS.
Jeanne
Thanks, I’m glad you love our site and ita- PPSS is fab!
I didn’t think about Stephen King, and I really love the point you made. I think you’re absolutely right. ♥
I read this last week and it still haunts me, I have no words for how powerful it is…
I had to stop after every other sentence cause I couldn’t take it, my eyes were tearing up and my stomach was twisting. It’s a story that challenged me and made me shake, but I’m glad I read it.