There is A Light by BellaDonnaCullen

Official Description:

This was 1987; before the Internet, before Twitter, before Facebook – this was back when it was still possible for people not to know about things: big things – like bands, and little things – like G-spots. AH, ExB, with some other parings along the way.

If you’re a child of the ‘80s, you may remember the angsty British band The Smiths, whose biggest U.S. album, Strangeways, Here We Come, features songs like “Girlfriend in a Coma,” with tormented, yet playful, lyrics like “girlfriend in a coma, I know, I know, it’s really serious” juxtaposed against light, bouncy pop. The Smiths, their music, and especially their lead singer, Morrissey, are a partial inspiration for this Bella and Edward AH story—though those of you who know that Morrissey was celibate needn’t worry about that (ahem, the fic lives up to its M rating).

Edward Cullen, lead singer and lyricist for The Masens, is a dark, conflicted, gorgeous musical genius who’s twice Bella’s age. Bella falls for him, first through his music when she’s 16 and needs an outlet for her pain, and for real when she meets him through a random encounter at 17 and later comes to live in his penthouse apartment. But does Edward love her back? Actually, did he ever love her? That’s the central question Bella, now 41, is asking herself 25 years later as she explains the story of the The Masens—and of Bella—to her kindergarten-age daughter, who we know only as Little One.

Sliding around in time from the 1980s from Bella’s troubled high school and college years, to the 1990s when she succeeds and gains fame of her own, and to late 2011 when she is grappling with her memories of Edward and her present with Little One, this story unfurls tantalizingly—like a mystery wrapped within a love story wrapped within a story of finding yourself and finding happiness. Told mostly in BPOV (with a satisfying smidge of EPOV), this fic is smart, poignant, and challenging, with enough moments of erotica and light, bouncy joy—just like The Smiths’ music, for which every chapter is named—to keep you hooked and wanting more. More than other AH fics out there, this story feels like real life—the ups and downs, the great loves and great heartaches, and the constancy of friends to help you through it all.

Like The Smiths/Masens’ music, Bella is all contradiction: She’s confident and insecure, giving and needy; she’s simultaneously tortured by and thrilled by her (unrequited?) love. For much of the story, she is making her own way in a world without her two best friends, Seth and Jake, without real parents to speak of, and possibly without Edward by her side. Edward is the definition of a miserable rock star: He has wealth and commercial success (The Masens’ final album, inspired by Bella, of course, becomes a mainstream hit), but he never really feels comfortable in his own skin, and he’s unsure if he should give into the deep emotions he feels for Bella.

We’re not sure if he can give in, if he’s even capable of it. As Edward tells 19-year-old Bella, while struggling with his overwhelming feelings for her:

“I don’t know yet, Isabella. I only know that this chapter involves an unlikely, but very deserving female lead. I found her two years ago, wet and bedraggled in a swamp, and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about her since.”

It turns out that’s the story of both of their lives, and this deep abiding love may not be good for either of them. As Morrissey once wrote, it seems some girls are bigger than others.

Our other favorite characters have unique roles in this fic, and it’s not yet clear if anyone is happy. Seth and Jake are best-friend alterna-skaters in Bella’s Long Island high school; they befriend this quiet outcast and introduce her to The Masens. They come in and out of her life in ways belladonna hasn’t fully revealed to us yet, but that we know are painful, joyful and perhaps unresolved. We know who Alice and Jasper are, but we don’t know if they’re together, or if Jasper is speaking to Edward. Rose marries Royce for reasons we suspect have to do with money and family expectations, despite her undeniable connection with Edward’s bodyguard Emmett. And Bella and Edward? We don’t know if they’re together, but we really don’t have enough clues yet to know how their lives have turned out.

In an early author’s note, Belladonna said this story “won’t be any angstier than The Practice of Love.” Those of you lucky enough to read her other completed AH fic know it was pretty angsty—but it delivered, big time, with an incredibly satisfying conclusion. I am convinced we’re on the same path in There is a Light—eventually we will have a huge payoff for all the heartfail belladonna is putting us through right now. Come see for yourself. Put on The Smiths and let the music wash over you as you catch up on this amazing fic!

This story. THIS STORY, YOU GUISE. *flailyhands*

It’s no secret that my ficlife has been looking a little…empty lately. I’ve picked up things here and there, but nothing has grabbed me and taken hold of my heart like this. It’s definitely the best fic I’ve read in a while – possibly ever. And it’s killing me in all the best ways.

When was the last time you found a story that had you begging for teasers and counting the hours until updates? For me, it’s been a long damn time (remember when HL5 updated weekly? Or With Teeth?). The fandom would collectively flail and the discussions on Twitter went crazy. We need more stories like this, ones that spark discussion and passion and excitement.

And I don’t care what the haters say about popular fics. If it’s popular, there’s typically a reason. In this case: it’s because the writing is fantastic, the characters are flawed but perfect and the story is mind-blowing. There are mysteries and a lot of questions still left to be solved and answered, but every week a little more slips out and as the story comes together, it just gets more intense.

It’s angsty and real and raw. It’s hot and romantic and even sad. But every second is completely worth it. If you’re not already reading this, what the hell are you waiting for? You’re foolishly missing out on greatness.

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