Official Description: CRACKFIC – Forks has been infested with zombies, and it’s up to the Cullens, as always, to save humanity. Written for humor. Read at your own risk. Very disgusting content within. Definitely M.

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Let me start out with one thing: in my honest opinion, izzyy is, hands down, one of the most hilarious ladies in the fandom.

No contest.

So when she tosses together her supernatural beings of choice – zombies – with our favorite All-American vampire family, you can be sure that it’s going to be funny as Hell. Gory, true; a bit disturbing – I mean, only this girl could write a train wreck of a zombie lemon, and keep you cracking up even as you cringe from behind your fingers.

And then, she ends it up with something like this:

“I’m cumming!” she screamed, clenching around me, and I finally erupted my virulent zombie-seed deep inside her sucking pussy. I rolled off her, sighing, slightly concerned with the tug I felt at my groin, and then I was the one screaming.

The Newtinator was still stuck inside her. My stinger was gone.

Sometimes being a zombie really sucks.

…

Of course, there’s the other usual suspects involved – vampires and Forks natives working together in order to survive an epidemic of brain-eating monsters brought about by Charlie Swan’s rancid whitefish chili.

Yes, you read that right.

I should have known that Forks would be the setting for the beginning of the end. Fucking humans. I personally thought Mike Newton triggered it with his general annoyingness, but it turns out I was wrong.

I had never been big on humans, even when I was one, but I always thought Chief Swan was a pretty good guy. I’d never have guessed this was his fault, but that’s what the FBI says.

…The CDC had tentatively concluded that Charlie Swan managed to nuke some rancid whitefish (used in his chili) into something incompatible with the digestive system. When the CDC questioned him, he admitted not tasting the chili himself. Bella pointed out that the whitefish in the freezer was not labeled, so no one has any idea how long it had been sitting. Scientists were testing other fish samples to see if the mutation occurred while it was being stored, while it was fresh, or when it was improperly cooked in the microwave. Just to be safe, all microwaves in Forks have been destroyed. The only Whitefish Fisherman on the Olympic Peninsula, a man with only a right hand known locally as “Lefty,” was also financially ruined.

Yes – that’s izzzyy for you. Inappropriate, disturbing and utterly unpredicable. That’s why you have to love her.